I left the house this weekend! Oh me! Oh my! Fancy, fancy! Who would have thought such a thing! But, yes, on occasion, I like to venture out into the real world and enjoy some good ol’ fashioned visceral experience. You know me- I’m a party ani-mule.. slamming gin & tonics (hold the gin, please!) at the bar, dancing on the bar, leaving at closing time, covered in sweat and various goo, yanno. The usual. You know how C-dawg rolls. (edit: I just try to be polite and un-noticed!)

Anyhow, this was a very fun event! I’ll have to check it out again sometime. It was at Exit, a Chicago punk-sorta-club, which was fun- I knew the doorman, so that made cigarettes fun, met a friend from the intarwebs, and had fun overall! I really like seeing people so happy!

The event was hosted by Vaudezilla, a local burlesque troupe. I met Red Hot Annie there, whom I’d been bantering with online for a couple years now.

But most of all, I went to see my friend Jolie perform. She’s an excellent and devoted belly dancer, and it was high time I saw it for myself. So, onto the train I go, leaving the safety of The Embassy (some call it an apartment) for points new and unknown.. And here we go.. wait for it.. SHAMELESS PLUG: GO TO JOLIE’S SITE. TAKE CLASSES!! She fucking rocks and is good stuff all around. Trust me!

I did put new batteries in the camera, but apparently, they’re good for about eight photos. But that’s okay! Photos after the jump.. Keep in mind, if they’re good, they were lucky shots. These guys move too fast for me! >_<



This was indeed a lucky shot- The kickass ink and ‘pose’ made for a nice photo.

Gil is a really nice person I met there too. I wish I had a recording of her voice- It’s simply fucking amazing.

Now, back to burning myself with my soldering iron.

Coffee Roasting

myself. So, after learning about the finer points of the coffee bean, in the employ of a large coffee chain (HEY! I had a lawyer to pay!) I appreciated it a whole lot more.

There’s an easy and a easier way about this. Really- I spend about two dollars per pound of freshly roasted coffee.. so here are your steps. I’m going to give the easy, beginner instructions.

1. Get a coffee roaster. You can get a nice Iroast 2, which is great- you can program all sorts of stuff into it, and it’ll do the work for you. The key is, with any roasting, to watch, smell, and listen. But I’d go easy your first time out, and get your wok out. This will do fine.

2. Buy some green coffee beans. Some ethnic food stores have these, but you are usually best served online, as you tend to get a better description of what you’re buying. I like beans from Java- low acidity, almost chocolate flavor. Blend, experiment. Get a sampler pack! Sweet Maria’s is the bomb for the new roaster. Pick up a Chemex, too. Total date points for the guys out there. Not that you need one, but they’re pretty great!

3. Warm up that wok! Turn the flame up high, and throw in about two cups of beans after it’s hot. Get a not-plastic implement out, and start stirring constantly.

4. Look, Listen, and Smell. Keep stirring until the beans are a little tiny bit under your desired darkness. There’s going to be chaff and stuff going around, just relax. Listen for “first crack”. You’ll know it. That’s your first sign that your beans will be done soon. Smell! If it smells like somethings burning, it probably is! And don’t quit stirring! Smoke? Probably! And after about ten minutes, your beans will be ready. Throw them in a colander with a lid (improvise!), taken them outside, and shake them, to remove the chaff, and cool them off, to stop the roasting process.

5. Seal up your beans in an airtight container, or bag. Let them “rest” for 24 hours. Grind, use a Chemex, French press, drip, whatever you like. Now, you taste the mess you’ve made. And there your learning begins- the art of roasting coffee. It will taste sweet, and totally different than anything in a store. That’s because it’s fresh- Coffee will only stay fresh for about a week. Too dark? Don’t roast as long. Too light? Roast longer.. Just keep stirring – you want an even roast.

It’s not a science, it’s an art. Eventually, blend! Learn! Impress the heck out of your friends! Have fun!!

1. I love cigars. I love tobacco! I don’t drink alcohol, so, I guess that’s my one vice, unless I take up crack smoking, guns, or smut. So, the first thing for me to do, would be to move my 4 large “coolerdors” (Read: Cheap cigar storage) with several hundred well-aged premium cigars to something nicer. I’d want something upright, and able to display the often beautiful art in cigar boxes and bands. This would do the job nicely. Great display piece, and includes an electronic humidifier- I use one in my ‘real’ humidor and have never been let down- Sure, it was pricey, but considering that just one of the cigars in the box of 75 is worth half of that, I considered it to be a good investment. So, Upright humidor, Check! I also own the best cigar ashtray, in my opinion: The Stinky Ashtray. Of course, with all this smoke, You’re going to need something to keep things nice, and prevent smoke damage. I like this one, just on form factor & finish: Csonka Super Smoker Cloaker. Also, it would be prudent to run ozone, too. But, Lucky me, good at electronics, can build the perfect one to conceal in the right place. Also, a good table lighter would be excellent. I have antique ones, but let’s dream a little, no? This one, in any thing but black or chrome, really appeals to my steampunky kind of tastes.

2. Furniture. This is rather tough! It would be nice to have a futon for guests and laying out, but it would damage the overall antique aesthetic I’m wanting. So, perhaps a nicely done black leather sofa? Room for two to cuddle on, indeed, and leather would not hold in stale cigar odor as much, and it’s a breeze to clean. I’d also like a particular few tables: Something like this would do great for holding the small collection of Roman antiquities & coins, silver rounds and art bars, and other small, precious items (family things, you know what I mean) that I’ve collected over the years, and do hope to add to! My current display, a bell jar with a custom made metal platform, will hopefully need to be upgraded! Add to that a good coffee table, too. I would also like to set a large hunk of glass on top, to keep it clean and nice.

3. Chess. It’s no secret that I love Chess. I play, I study it, and have an average of three games going at once. (Want to play? Contact me!) Another dream is to have an heirloom quality chess set in my ‘dream den’. Something I can pass along to the younger generations, and prize. And, as a side thought, It would be nice to have a table of sorts, that I could stack multiple chess sets on, and simply slide out the one I wish to address. Anyhow, I find this one to be very striking- My favorite color of blue! It might not fit into the overall decor, but I think a little slip is okay. Of course, I could also give in to my adoration of Doctor Who and go for this bad boy.. ultra rare, and 4,500 in US dollars. And there’s a wooden TARDIS! But, that would be something more for me, and I could easily see it not lasting as an heirloom long after my passing! Crazy Uncle/Father Christopher and his Doctor Who obsession.

4. Art: I feel I’ve got this pretty well covered already. Not that there aren’t people I’d love to have pieces from, But that all comes in time. I shy away from sculpture, but I feel the right one will find me. But for painting, I’d like one of Auburn Lahoski’s new works. I went to high school with her, and have seen her work just get better and better. I do hope she gets an online portfolio going, but I assume she’s busy. Other than that, check my links for other wonderful art.

5. Entertainment. Oh, bookshelves! Several will be needed! I would like to drive back to my hometown (more than 1000, less than 2000 miles) and retrieve the books and records that I have in storage. There’s a lot, and Lori has a lot, so it’s a big undertaking But, A nice record player, with a good tube preamp would be great, with it going into the requisite sweet television and surround sound. Also, A Victrola would be an excellent addition- Unless, of course, I got a record player that could play those great old 78’s. I had one very similar demonstrated to me yesterday, and I was amazed.. the aesthetics, the totally analog approach, all of it- It was really an ingenious thing.

6. Finally, we have FOOD. I have an antique gumball machine I’ve restored, which would be nice, but I would be more inclined to fill it with seashells or marbles, because I simply can’t eat that much candy before it spoils! Or, I could fill it with cigar bands- not a bad idea. But, it would still be nice to have a small fridge, for a copious supply of Virgil’s and ginger beer. A sweet little popcorn machine would be a nice addition, But I think the espresso machine belongs in kitchen.

Wow.. now it just all seems excessive!